{"id":424,"date":"2011-09-22T05:50:10","date_gmt":"2011-09-22T10:50:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.aguidetoselfsabotage.com\/?p=424"},"modified":"2011-09-22T10:07:49","modified_gmt":"2011-09-22T15:07:49","slug":"online-dating-letter-42","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.aguidetoselfsabotage.com\/2011\/09\/22\/online-dating-letter-42\/","title":{"rendered":"online dating letter #42"},"content":{"rendered":"

I knew she lived too far away to make it work, but it’s the Internet.<\/em><\/p>\n

Hi,<\/p>\n

Being afraid of heights is a good thing. I’m afraid of them too. To deal with this I strapped myself to a German man and ran off a cliff. I expected gravity to take over but a hang glider really hangs.<\/p>\n

If you like cookies and Apple you’ll really like the chocolate chip cookies at their cafeteria. I think the imac was overrated compared to those cookies.<\/p>\n

Cheers,
\nAnthony<\/p>\n

She replied.<\/em><\/p>\n

Now I can’t stop thinking about cookies. I’d make some but I have to go riding. Maybe afterwards.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

She has a horse. Who doesn’t?<\/em><\/p>\n

Make cookies and get a handful of carrier pigeons. Attach cookies to pigeons. Send them to NYC.<\/p>\n

How do horses balance their massive frames on such skinny ankles?<\/p>\n

She replied again. Nice.<\/em><\/p>\n

If I had some cookies I would surely send them your way. It would be my thank you for making me laugh on a day I spent pumping out my basement. \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

I always wonder how horses keep their tiny little legs from breaking like twigs. They manage it though thankfully or my vet bills would be much higher.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

It has rained a lot recently. Or “pumping out my basement” is a reference to a weight loss program.<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em>Did you know that basements were first created as prank in 645 BC? A couple of ancient Greeks thought it would be a hoot (people hooted much more then) to dig a hole under their friend Ronnie’s house. It rained, the basement flooded, hilarity ensued and Ronnie moved to Persia. Oddly enough after moving to Persia Ronnie invented the cookie.<\/p>\n

Hope your horse is a mudder. I learned that from my either my Irish grandfather who spent too much time at the track or from some movie.<\/p>\n

Don’t know why, but she replied again. Fer realz yo.<\/em><\/p>\n

Strangely enough, my horse comes from a line of mudders.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I replied.<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em>It would have been odd if you said your horse came from a line of cats.<\/p>\n

She deleted her account.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I knew she lived too far away to make it work, but it’s the Internet. Hi, Being afraid of heights is a good thing. I’m afraid of them too. To deal with this I strapped myself to a German man and ran off a cliff. 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