One of the fans of this site was having trouble getting any woman to respond to his online dating profile. He requested that OK Stupid help him out.

After looking through his profile the problem was clear – he’s illiterate. Below are the direct quotes from his profile.

My self-summary ..perhaps ..i am what a i am ..

Read that one again. Slowly. Got it? Now read it again. Write us if you can translate it into English.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit balance between logic and emotion….is a process… perhaps a life long process

OK Stupid is now heavily medicated in order to heal from the psychic damage caused by the lunatic that wrote this. But we had a job to do and this is what we came up with.

My self-summary Creating seductive grooves and controlling interstellar air sculptures on hyperbolic surfaces… that move your body

Oh, it’s bullshit. We know this. But there is a woman out there that wants to have this chocolate nonsense melt all over her soul. Maybe not, but at least it’s in English.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit That I’m from Detroit…Next question.

Who doesn’t like a bad boy attitude? Grownups, but this might work for him. We’ll let you know.