landlord helper

She wishes her landlord would be more responsive.


Here are my suggestions to motivate your landlord:

  • Claim you have rats. Once they come over to fix that problem mention that you noticed the bathroom sink leaks.
  • Tell them you no longer believe in locking common area doors because it impedes the flow of chi. Perhaps if your front window was not painted shut you could let the chi in that way.
  • Invest in a high performance stereo system. When you leave for work have it blasting death metal. They’ll come in during the day to turn it off. Place a note listing your demands/requests.

Will any of these work? I don’t know but I look forward to you letting me know.


She replied.

Ha, I’m not sure of these would motivate my landlord but I like my neighborhood (post gentrified Fort Greene) so I accept my landlord situation.

On my profile I mention that I helped gentrify Fort Greene. I wrote back.

Well I’m glad I helped pioneer your neighborhood. Pre-gentrified Fort Greene was a post apocalyptic landscape until brave souls like me came along and lasted until we were mugged in our own apartment buildings.

Maybe claim you were mugged in your building.

Maybe she was mugged because I never heard from her again.

About Author: anthony

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